I am sitting in a seafood restaurant in Los Angeles, but I swear I am in New England, feasting on a traditional clambake spread.

Welcome to Connie and Ted’s, a funky, delectable new seafood restaurant in West Hollywood. The folks who bring you Providence restaurant, possibly the best restaurant in Los Angeles, have opened this huge, down home, modern clam shack.

The structure reminds me of the Brady Bunch house on steroids (how 21st century). It can get loud, so I would recommend sitting outside unless you sit at the expansive bar to get an up close and personal view of the inner workings of Connie and Ted’s.

Skip the wine and order the hard stuff, a specialty cocktail or beer. The wine list sucks and all the selections taste like colored water. We started with the special tomato salad and it was amazing…perfectly ripened tomatoes with fresh basil and a light EVOO and balsamic vinegar dressing.

The lobster ($25 per lb, size varies between 1-2 pounds) was sweet, meaty and decadent. I worked it over better than one of the hookers Justin Bieber picked up in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil this past weekend. You can have it broiled or boiled …broiled is the only way to go which any good ole New England girl knows…boiled makes the innards watery.

The steamers ($21) were fresh, plump, succulent and delish…close your eyes and you are in Maine. I always rinse, but never dip in drawn butter, but I dipped once and for some reason I couldn’t believe their butter…scrumptious.

The lobster roll ($24) was authentic without all the unnecessary fillers. The massive fish and chips platter arrived crispy and moist ($21). Sides are plentiful. We chose the mac and cheese which was cheesy with a gorgeous, crispy top…could have been a creme brûlée. All that pleasure for a mere $5.00!

Service was helpful and attentive. I wish I could remember our server’s name…she is an honest, New Jersey woman who definitely was in touch with the best items on the menu. Everything she recommended was stellar.

Reservations are mandatory as this place is hotter than the love story between Connie and Ted.

Connie and Ted’s, 8171 Santa Monica Blvd at Havenhurst Drive, West Hollywood. Open Monday-Thursday 5-11pm and Friday-Sunday 12-11pm. Valet and street parking.