Feng Shui Me…

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Warning: Do not read if you are feeling happy unless you are a member of my Co-op board, a former LA friend or any of the haters who will be delighted to know that I am in the shits.

Thought for the day…why is it that many secretly revel in people’s miseries?

Tuesday, I had a truly hideous day.

Along with legions of investors, I lost money in the market.

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I received a photo of the new inadvertent skylight installed in my NYC apartment by a jackhammer doing renovations in the upstairs apartment…100 times bigger than formerly notified and found out that management and the Board does not give a rat’s ass about all the destruction I have endured over 8 years.

The Yankees lost 15-1.

My mother did hand to hand combat with our family tree and the tree lost. Only $2000 to win that battle and we lost an old friend.

Finn added destruction of newly painted front door to her mile high pile of teething targets.

My daughter had a bit too much Reality TV reality.

It took me 35 minutes to drive 2 miles in Pacific Palisades. Finally, out of the city that does not know how to accelerate, I pulled a Mario Andretti and got to Olympic and 14th in 7 minutes and was told by the vet’s office that they improperly booked my dog’s appointment. Please, turn the car around and head home.

I ate everything that wasn’t tied down.

The car is misbehaving.

I had a chiropractor appointment at Equinox and passed a multitude of 20 year-olds who were thin and their hair looked good after exercising…WTF!

The air head in front of me in at the deli counter at Whole Foods like took like 10 like minutes to like decide on like 2 purchases and she like sampled like 10 like items before she like made like a decision…like come on Douchie Von Douchie.

Donald Trump is still talking.

The US Open is happening without me for the first time in a decade.

I am sleep deprived due to inner turmoil.

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There is a lot of bad shit happening in the world and maybe the entire planet earth should be feng shui’d, harmonizing everyone with their surrounding environment.

I don’t know, but the non-believers can rejoice in the fact that I couldn’t wait to turn out the lights and forget that the day ever happened.

Hopefully, today will be a better day.

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