Eggs, the unfertile kind…

Good morning….not too much sleep…another side effect from the middle-aged mayhem disease. I should just participate in Happy Hour daily, but once you are over 35, recovery time is much longer. When I spent two decades on the road with big name rock ‘n roll bands, I could drink legendary rockers under the table until 5am and be up by 9am to entertain press and pitch story lines. Now, two martinis, my drink of choice, and check, please if I want a stable tomorrow. (Chopin vodka, extra dry, extra olives) I must tell you that I did extensive vodka research, having sampled over 15 vodkas and found Chopin to be #1 in my book…tough gig, but someone had to do it.
By the way, if you are in Los Angeles, April makes the best fricking martini at BOA Santa Monica. She is the beautiful, intelligent, lovely blonde behind the bar on the weekend and can make any drink you mention. She also knows her wines and has an unparalleled ability to smile in the face of obnoxious patrons.
Conversely, if in NYC, go see the spitfire, quick witted, and equally attractive, Nairoby, at the bar at Landmarc in the Time Warner building at Columbus Circle. She will set you up with a fine martini (unfortunately, they do not stock Chopin, but Ketel One or Grey Goose are a suitable and tasty substitute and their wines are fine!) So, a shout out to two amazing women who do not sweat yet even under pressure.
Today, I am attempting to do a Father’s Day assist for the mom’s and daughters who hear my voice. We really do speak a different language from the male specie with no translation provided, but we still do manage to co-exist and for the most part, love and adore the men in our lives.
Case in point, my daughter’s father and my husband, the Divine David. I hit the jackpot with that man and this is an unprejudiced viewpoint.
Everyone I meet initially likes me (or hates me, no in between!) but the standard comment goes like this, “You’re great, but your husband is amazing!” Okay, allow me to list his virtues:
Handsome, smart, can out speed read any of Evelyn Wood’s speed reading proteges, has an accent and makes ‘shit” sound dignified and appealing. I wasn’t going to speak until my daughter, Courtny, was 2 years-old in order to assure that she would have an English accent, but those in the know, know that I could never keep quiet for an extended period of time!
David was born in America, but grew up in England and South Africa so for all the single girls who say they cannot meet a great American guy, I say, “Outsource, baby.” During my extensive dating period, I found imports tend to be more refined and elegant, have a great sense of style while being straight and do not have mommy issues.
Today’s recipe is giving all the mothers, daughters and kiddies an easy, economical, healthy jump on Father’s Day breakfast in bed.


Breakfast Sandwich

Eggs, definitely cage free
Ciabatta roll preferred, any hard roll will do, or bread, bagel
Arugula, wild preferred like your men
Kosher salt
Fresh Ground Pepper
Optional: butter or spray butter the roll

Firstly, I must say that I am a PAM addict….it is my cooking crack. Please don’t write and tell me I will eventually have a PO, PAM overdose. I can’t give it up. So I liberally spray my pan with PAM and heat the pan before cracking the egg. I sprinkle my standby Kosher salt and fresh ground pepper after I spray the PAM or the salt and pepper will fly up your nose and all over the stove top.
Crack that egg. (sounds like you should have Devo playing in the background, “Crack That Whip”)
My family likes their eggs over hard and crispy around the edges. Flip it so both sides are crispy…if you like it runny then do not flip. It’s amazing how lousy eggs can taste as it appears to be an easy cooking item, but not true….
Toast roll. I always take out the doughy center as you can snuggle that egg and additional items in very nicely. Plus, I am always looking for calories cutters.
Slice 3 pieces of avocado
Cut 1 slice of tomato and lightly salt with Kosher salt
A handful of wild arugula
Lightly butter or spray roll, bread, bagel.
1st layer is the arugula, then avocado, next tomato and last but not least, the egg.
Serve as a whole sandwich or open face


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