My Life…Any Takers?!


I have had over 24 hours to get over a Giant loss and the pain and humiliation is still lingering.

Yesterday, former NY Giant great and talk show host, Michael Strahan, said it may be a very looooong season…happy days.

I have retreated to my campsite with my best friend, Madison. Seriously, my home is so deconstructed that a campsite provides more comfort with a fire pit, tent and outhouse.

I cannot wait to head to NYC to live in a real home away from pathetic contractors, dust and ransacked rooms.


I don’t mean to complain, but my NYC home offers little mental solace because the entitlementors upstairs have been reduced to one, but the person left standing is the dangerous one.

Her husband went in for bypass surgery and succumbed. Now the waterboarder is hanging solo, completely unattended and capable of causing flooding, pestilence, mold and mildew at any moment.

It’s a good thing that every inch of my Manhattan homestead is shrink wrapped and my super super does frequent spot checks.

So when people say they are great I want to strangle them because I am green with envy. When will life become fun again and routine settle in?

I am a neat freak and there is no comfort or order and now with the Giants 0-1 and the Yankees pretty much out of the wild card race, I am desolate.

I could rally in New York, but after all the expenses in Los Angeles, retail therapy is off the list of must do’s. I may not be able to feed my theater beast and trying to buy student rush tickets is off the table as I have aged 20 years in the last month. I need to save up for future Juvederm injections.

Today, I am going to buy a large chocolate bar, keep Madison close and wait all day for the water heater man, Restoration Hardware delivery, the Verizon man who returns for the third time to try and bring us internet and phone reception in the front half of our money pit, furniture from HD Buttercup (west coast version of ABC Carpet), DirecTV, FedEx delivery of a farmhouse kitchen sink and a decorator consultation…that’s just today’s line up of fun filled activities…ain’t life grand?!


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