I feel I am being stalked.

No, not by some creepy human, but by humidity.

July in New York City was painful for this menopausal woman.

The humidity was oppressive.

Every day, my doggies, Madison, Finnley and I huffed and puffed our way through Central Park.

I was looking forward to living in Los Angeles and reveling in the dry climate.

Denied.

I have lived on and off in California for more than 30 years and I have never experienced muggy, humid weather in the sunshine state.

There is no escaping the oppressive saturated curtain of water vapor. (I always wanted to be the Vanna White of weather women).

Things have become so out of hand that even the WASPY Birkin Bag carrying long straight hair blondes in the Palisades are having bad hair days.

I went hiking very early yesterday morning and you could have rung me out.

I experienced a moment when I thought I was lost in the eastern time zone.

The weather is like a fruit salad full of crazy.

Al Gore, you lost the presidential election against Bush, but you nailed it regarding climate change.

You are damn straight that this is an Inconvenient Truth.

Just look at my hair.

*Photo:Wilmington Star News