Selfie…

Kim Kardashian Selfie
Kim Kardashian Selfie

Selfie has to be a derivative of selfish and not just a photo of yourself.

Seriously, my index finger is exhausted from unfriending Facebook friends because I am ready to vomit from seeing certain people strike a pose multiple times daily. Is anyone really interested?

I’m down with showcasing a great hair day or a fab outfit once in a while, but redundancy is not a valued social trait.

The days of posing for a family photo or a self portrait are history and have given birth to taking “selfies,” an activity that has grown so popular that the word, selfie, was the Oxford Dictionaries Word of the Year for 2013, narrowly beating out twerk.

Selfie debuted in 2002 when a young Aussie man took a picture of himself bleeding on the floor after falling down drunk and placing the photo online. He apologized for the lack of focus because it was a “selfie.”

Selfies, according to the dictionary, are a self-portrait  photograph, typically taken with a hand-held digital camera or camera phone. Selfies are often shared on social networking services for the enjoyment of the entire world.

Miley Cyrus Selfie
Miley Cyrus Selfie

They are often casual, and are typically taken either with a camera held at arm’s length or in a mirror. The most commonly used hashtags when uploading a selfie is “#me.”

The pretentious poses actually have names. These kids have too much time on their hands or Paris Hilton sent out a mass email, enumerating the poses and some stoner named them.

The power poses are the ‘chicken wing’ which you pose with hand on hip and makes you look thinner while hiding love handles. You then arch your back which makes the girls look bigger.

Kris Jenner Duck Mouth
Kris Jenner Duckface

Then there is ‘duckface’ which is all about sucking in your cheeks and pursing your lips a la  Kris Jenner, the selfie matriarch of the Kardashian clan.

Bo and Michelle Obama Selfie
Bo and Michelle Obama Selfie

Unfortunately, it has gone mainstream. Michelle Obama has taken a selfie with her dog, Bo. Chelsea Clinton tweeted a selfie with mom, Hillary. Our Commander In Chief and Veep got in the game. Even Pope Francis, who has a Twitter account, has posed with his flock in a selfie.

Hillary and Chelsea Clinton Selfie
Hillary and Chelsea Clinton Selfie

Talk shows have had renown photographers as guests to provide tips on taking the most flattering selfies. Hoda Kobt has gone on record, recommending that you open wide…makes your face look slimmer…my thought, it showcases your surprise at how ridiculous you look taking a selfie.

Barack Obama, Joe Biden Selfie
Barack Obama, Joe Biden Selfie
Jacqueline Bisset, Hoda Kobt, Jane Seymour Selfie
Jacqueline Bisset, Hoda Kobt, Jane Seymour Selfie

Recently, The Chainsmokers, a New York City DJ duo, have released a single and accompanying video, #SELFIE. The track defines the twenty something self-centered, social media obsessed entitlementors who cut a swathe through today’s society, twerking their life away from Los Angeles to Manhattan and cities in between.

In the video, the  lyrics are delivered by a vapid clubber who recites dialogue to a friend in a club bathroom. She complains about how few ‘likes’ her Instagram photos are getting. She ruminates about the best filter for her photos and constantly disappears to take a selfie.

Let’s face it, there has to be something more interesting to focus on. Consider me your social media therapist. I recommend a selfie-help group…read a book, take up painting, volunteer to teach photography to underprivileged kids, just stop with the selfies.

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