Closure is a bitch.
I assume there is satisfaction once the task is finished.
The backstory is my mother is unable to return to our family homestead.
It is now my responsibility to clear 68 years of possessions and memories from the house.
This weekend (4th consecutive) David, Courtny and I logged another 10 hours of sifting and sorting in a chilly attic.
We dodged nails protruding from the roof and walked away with spider web extensions.
The setting is a large, 100 year-old house filled with furniture, a plethora of china, antiques, all to peruse and place in either the keep or sell sections.
When David, Courtny and I moved from a big house in San Francisco we sold all our furniture, but kept the wedding presents and years worth of retail therapy including clothing, items from our travels and our own version of Crate and Barrel, employing the attic as our storage space.
Now, it is time to pay the piper.
It is an emotional roller coaster parting with items that have sentimental value.
I unwrap something that reminds me of my grandparent’s house.
The tea set I used to have tea time with my dad when I was five after he came home from a long day at work.
The vintage array of gorgeous tea cups that I always told my mom I wanted when I grew up.
Courtny’s first cup and saucer, her first art project.
All my rock ‘n roll and sports memorabilia.
Backstage passes and gold and platinum albums.
Family photos.
My record album collection and stereo.
Deja vu all over again…this weekend we felt as if we were celebrating a wedding as we unwrapped the bounty of amazing gifts.
But, what does one do?
I will never have a spacious home again.
Is it worth it to pay to store all these things?
I am way closer to death than when I was married and had a baby.
I don’t have room in any present location for this overflow of fabulosity.
I am going to have to purge myself of childhood as well as adult assets.
This is a hugely difficult assignment.
And, note to self, I will never shop again, especially for home goods.
Possessions become cumbersome, especially with age.
This entire endeavor is truly bittersweet and stirs up issues of mortality.
I am looking forward to closure.
*image: manywinters.com
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I do understand. We are needing to do the same and I, a saver , am finding it so difficult. We are going from a home to a much smaller..easier to care for..condo. No basement or attic….ugh! How do you-did you deal with furniture? Sell, donate,give or all of the above? Good luck…can imagine . Love to yo all.
I was lucky that my sisters were the ones to clean out my mom’s condo. I recently downsized houses. Got a 2 yard dumpster and filled it to the brim. Posted furniture on a garage sale Facebook page where I sold most of my furniture and dishes, etc. Then had an estate sale for the rest. Didn’t have much left for that. Then everything that was left was donated. I moved to a house that only is a one car garage…. no basement. I need my 2 yard dumpster again.
I’m never going back to saving. Once I sell or store my photo albums, gold and platinum albums, sports memorabilia (Giants and Yankees sports lust) and very special stuff, I am passing everything on to shelters or Goodwill. This is so difficult and time consuming. Courtny doesn’t even want the fine china or sterling!