Make A Wish…

Today is Queen E.’s birthday.

I would love to take her out for a pinkies up lunch in New York City.

Queen E. really looked forward to driving herself into Manhattan after her weekly blowout with Liz, decked out in a St. John knit ensemble with purple accessories, excited about having lunch at an elegant restaurant like Le Grenouille.

Today, I would order her a glass of champagne and start my apology tour.

Beyond singing your praises of fierce loyalty and unbreakable devotion to those you loved, your admirable artistic skills, your cole slaw, coconut cookies and brisket edible delights and your unwavering appreciation for the even the smallest act of kindness, I also need to acknowledge some slights on my part.

Mom, I’m sorry for always ridiculing you for taking half of your uneaten hamburger to go.

I do that now and sauté fresh onions and redo the fixings just as you had done.

I have also been known to start dinner at 5:30…I often asked how you could eat dinner so early. During my residence in Coronaville I fell prey to Early Bird meals.

I have joined the electricity patrol squad, yapping at housemates to turn off lights when they leave a room…I’m not cheap just environmentally aware.

I am up by 4am and look forward to that first cup of coffee just as you did sitting in the quiet serenity of your beautiful kitchen at the incredibly uncomfortable breakfast set you inherited from Syd.

And now I crave that afternoon delight of a cup of “hot” coffee with “a little something sweet!”

I zero in on crumbs on the counter and floor and go down for the kill scooping up the offender with one swipe of a moistened finger.

I have heard myself call Daniel Jones (NY Giants quarterback) a shit heel just as you called Eli Manning that ridiculous name for over a decade.

I too have found a new dislike for Ellen DeGeneres for reasons unknown.

I told Courtny a cute story about you yesterday.

You used to ask one of the owners of your hair salon in Connecticut if you could have his Ralph Lauren button down shirts after he finished with them. Peter was tall and strapping and you loved them for a preppy Greenwich attitude beach cover up.

You were always full of surprises…so clever even in your late 90s!

I have become you in so many ways and I am unable to let you know.

Hoping that you can hear me now!

As daddy always said, “Missing you more than tongue can tell!”

Happy 101st birthday, Queen E…cheers to pirouetting your way through your special day 👑💜


  1. Sending my good wishes as well.
    Happy Birthday!

  2. Happy Birthday from Paula as well. I am still hearing the the deep quality of your voice.

  3. Bruce Alpert says:

    What a beautiful and moving tribute!

  4. You know how much I loved your mom!! Happy heavenly birthday. I’m sure she’s with my mom celebrating!

  5. Ellie lupo says:

    My dear Toby,
    You were on my list to contact today…..knew it was your Mom’s birthday . Love love what you wrote and isn’t funny and wonderful that we do take on some of our Mother’ ways. She was a special lady that I really did love. I bet she is watching you have that coffee,not watch Ellen which I cannot anymore also and pick up those crumbs! Happy birthday to her with a smile and much love which goes to you also💜

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