Before I rehash the fashion from last night’s Met Gala I need to get something off my semi-tan chest.

That Longgggga Island accent needs some refinement.

Yesterday, my daughter and I were playing tennis and no one else was on any of the 12 courts.

It was 9:55am and four rude women come onto the court and bellow, ”that’s ours!”  We suggested playing on one of the other empty 11 courts and they refused.

It’s the tone. They can cut glass with those voices.

Step away…nothing gentile or refined here!

Anyway, back to critiquing the Met Gala clothing.

Anna Wintour, the Devil wore Loewe and an impressive diamond necklace, The Kardashians win for unimaginative, Sarah Jessica Parker is spot on, Gigi Hadid and Nicki Minaj were very thematic, Rita Ora looked like a polluted waterfall, Demi Moore rocked it, Kaia Gerber and Ariana Grande were boring, Serena Williams looked like a dish ready for the oven all wrapped up in foil, Penelope Cruz looked like a flamenco dancer, Deborah Roberts looked like she emerged from the sea dripping in seaweed, JLo over did an already dramatic, stunning Schiaparelli, Mindy Kaling was very interesting, Zendaya was not portraying her usual fabulosity, Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin’s  daughter Amelia Gray Hamlin wore a glow in the dark dress as bloated as her mother’s lips, the men were mucho creative.

The tickets ran $75,000 per person. Many attendees looked like they needed a good meal. I hope the price included some stellar dishes.

Enjoy the fashion.

Credit: Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images/Demi Moore