Giant Changes…

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Giant news this week.

Head coach of my beloved New York Football Giants was fired and so ends his 12 year run.

Tom Coughlin photo:onlinenewsplanet.com
Tom Coughlin photo:onlinenewsplanet.com

Women, don’t stop reading because you think this is just another boring sports post.

Learn from this.

Sports is the great equalizer. You can impress your boss, significant other and potential dates with inside trading info…level the sexist playing field…sports can be interesting and entertaining.

Listen up…from all accounts, Tom Coughlin was a Giant among men, but when you miss the NFL playoffs four years running, change is needed…no demanded.

As repeatedly witnessed this season, the NY Giants caved and lost in the waning minute (singular) of six games which they should have won.

Yet again, the Giants fumbled the ball when they only fired the coach instead of making massive cuts.

Giant GM, Jerry Reese phto: nj.com
Giant GM, Jerry Reese photo: nj.com

It was time for Coach Coughlin to bid adieu. He wasn’t being heard, but the BIGGEST offender was Jerry Reese, the Giants general manger.

Reese inherited unparalleled talent from his predecessor, Ernie Accorsi. Reese’s drafting, other than NY Giants superstar receiver, Odell Beckham, Jr., has been abysmal. His free agency selections have been a bust, but he is still ensconced in the front office.

Girlfriends, this situation is similar to dating. You want to select a potential star, be part of a winning team, but you always pick losers and stick with them too long…wake up, clean house and move on.

The Giants owners, especially the Mara family, are historically way too cautious.

The Giants need a big, bold move right now…don’t call for a wimpy running play up the middle when what they really need to do is throw a long pass down the field and score.

Giant fans are mad as hell and we won’t take it anymore.

Get us some real football players instead of these pussies who are always injured and fat butt offensive linemen, especially the right side of the Giants O line, who can’t stop any oncoming traffic.

Eli Manning is on his back more than Madonna and Giants never score inside the 5 yard line…pathetic.

We demand pass rushers and big guys on defense who can stop the run. Without defense you will never get to the playoffs or the ultimate goal, the Super Bowl.

We need a Lawrence Taylor, Michael Strahan, Justin Tuck, Harry Carson, Carl Banks, Brad Van Pelt, Pepper Johnson, Leonard Marshall, George Martin, Jim Katcavage, Osi Umenyiora, Andy Robustelli, Sam Huff…these were great Giant defensive players.

Jerry Reese, are you listening?!

It will be interesting to see who the Giants hire as head coach.

photo:bankrate.com
photo:bankrate.com

I will never divorce the Giants, but it sure looks like it will be another couple of rocky years in this painful, dysfunctional marriage.

I may have to burn all my Giants paraphernalia in protest including underpants, t-shirts, pajamas, shorts, sweatshirts, earrings, watches, socks, hats, gloves, leather jackets, windbreakers, bags, seat cushions, blankets, sheets, bobble head dolls, license plates and vintage scrapbooks from 1965 to present.

I am in desperate need of counseling because I cannot spend another frustrating, joyless season, screaming at the TV, enduring sleepless Sunday nights and the look on my husband’s face that says, “Toby you are cra cra. I think you should be committed.”

We need our Big Blue Wrecking Crew back. Draft or trade for some real, talented football players in Blue, not inferior athletes masquerading in authentic NY Giants uniforms.

The Giants have $50 million in salary cap. Do you have any idea what I could buy for that much cash…along with some superb football talent, I could enhance my shoe and bag collection and do some traveling, feed droves of starving American children. Now that is creatively working the salary cap.

Come on, you gutless front office weenies…Just Do It.

Restore Giant pride and our former winning ways.

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