HaHaHaSalon…the laugh is on the customer.

HaSalon (Hebrew for living room) is a new addition to the NYC dining scene.

HaSalon, which originated in Tel Aviv, is aiming to continuing its’ upscale party hot spot reputation in NYC along with serving up their farm fresh ingredients.

Top Israeli Chef and entrepreneur, Eyal Shani, the man who brought the world Miznon offering fab felafels and put cauliflower back on the culinary map, has opened HaSalon in Hell’s Kitchen.

The ambiance is lovely and the the farm to table displays are enticing.

But, holy mackerel, the prices and portion size are ridiculous.

The food was tasty, although I did not not have a culinary orgasm and for the price I should have.

Here’s the scoop.

Firstly, securing a reservation is challenging.

Resy, which is a huge pain in the ass reservations app, never has an opening so you click on Notify.

You then get pinged constantly because once you show desire, Resy responds.

The weird thing is that I dined at HaSalon on a recent Saturday and the restaurant was half full.

HaSalon has two seatings…6 and 8pm.

The early show is all about the food and the 8pm seating is more of a party with a live DJ.

Perhaps millennials drink voraciously and don’t notice the high price point.

HaSalon is located in the Skyline Hotel and is only open Thursday through Saturday.

We sat at the kitchen counter where a line of eight intense cooks feverishly slice and dice.

The high back chairs were so close together that you could barely spread your wings to ingest the food.

The low-ceiling dining room, outfitted with random shaped tables, seats approximately 120 patrons.

We settled in and selected an Israeli wine which was wonderful, but not inexpensive ($88).

The server brought over a sour cream dip with  pizza bread. The sour cream was wonderful and thankfully we had this amuse bouche to help fill us up.

*Please note as with a rearview mirror, the portion size looks larger in the photos.

We began the designer priced experience with Calamari leaves on Hot Iron, oozing on Chickpeas. It was good, but for $59 not thrilling.

This was followed by a Bag of Green Beans which were served cold and literally in a paper bag. The beans were delicious and the only dish that was plentiful…$19 for beans they damn well better give me a plethora of beans.

Since I was not willing to use my mortgage money for fish priced at over $100 our final item was pasta.

We selected One 12 foot long Pici noodle with Sage and it was one long noodle which equaled about 3 bites per person all for the ridiculous price of $32.

I have paid that much for pasta before, but it is an ample serving size served with such goodies as uni or short rib.

This ONE noodle had nothing, but sage and parmesan cheese.

I may pay $32 for “sage advice”, but not for a singular piece of sage.

I find it necessary to list some of the items with their prices:

Avocado Bruschetta (aka avocado toast) $27

Wild wood oven burnt Margarita Pizza $27

1 “naked” chopped tomato $24

Green Fields Salad…literally a bag of greens $22

Japanese Sea Fatty Toro Tartar ( tiny portion) $45

Red Snapper, Mediterranean vegetables $169

Grilled wild Saragus (Seabream) $109

Turbot $220

Minute Steak $79

3 cuts of Lamb $89

Desserts $28

I’m closing the door on HaSalon.

Once bitten twice shy so I will never dine at HaHa…you have been dubbed…Salon ever again.

HaSalon 735 10th Avenue New York City. Open for dinner Thursday, Friday and Saturday 6pm-12am. Reservations on Resy.